The Best Way to Hide your Valuables

Some years ago, I was billed to take the Joint Admission and Matriculation Board’s Exam. I was very prepared and very sure that I would score above 200 marks, which was the minimum cut- off for progression unto the next stage of the admission hunting war. I was however, not sure of the particular range above 200 my score would fall into: whether it would be 201 or 299, I couldn’t say, I just knew that based on my level of preparation, I could not score below 200. But I wanted to score very high, at least in the range of 250 - 270 to boost my chances of gaining admission that year. So I met a friend who was into exams runs and he promised to forward some answers to my phone on the day of the exam as far as I can manage to take my phone into the exam hall. I knew that might be a problem, but I still assured him that I would be with my phone and he should perform his magic as promised!

Short poem - The past beget the future!?

Okay people, I know It's been long since I updated this blog. It's not my fault - I've been so busy and tired. Tired to the extent that I wore the back of my shirt to work and did not notice until I got to the office. Imagine the intensity of the tiredness! I noticed though that people kept giving me that surprising look but nobody was bold enough to approach me. I interpreted their glances to mean that they admired my looks - I actually, was feeling fly. chai! I pity myself! Anyway, today, I'll be doing a poem.

This poem came to me in one of my sober moments - I actually do have lots of sober moments. That's where most of my posts come from. This one however, came from a very sober moment. Infact, when I wrote this poem, I was more sober than what the word 'sober' meant in the dictionary. A lot of us, including me, really want to do things differently. We want to change; at least from good to better (I would not agree that I am bad, mbanu!). But you see, habits (whether good or bad) are not so easy to kill. In short, if you are not careful, they would turn around to kill you!

So... as I was saying... Just Enjoy!

THE PAST BEGETS THE FUTURE...

This shall be the last

The last of all my past
A past that overshadows the present
And attempts to creep into the future
A past that has refused to die
But has the future in its eye

How can it be my past?

When it still holds me in its grip
And torments me with its whip
Its guilty feelings I cannot cast
And its dark memories fill my nostrils

But it can be my last…

Yes I can put it in the past
I can tie on my shoe lace
And take my future to its place
A place dissected from the past
The last of which I just passed

But if past begets the future

Then I have not seen the last
The last of a misdirected past…
 

I hope this made you sober, like I was when I wrote it!

The Gospel of my existence

Like play, like play, 2013 has come and gone (or would soon go). I envisage that everyone would be in the mood of stock-taking, resolution making (that would obviously not be kept) and joyful celebrations as they hope to encroach into 2014. I intended a very serious post to end the year but changed my mind. I getting too serious these days... So, for your 'enjoytainment', I came up with this post. It's not going to leave you in a state of rib cracking laughter but it's something you would enjoy...

This world is not simple...

There are no simple things in this life. Things are simple because we assume them to be. If we take out time to look deeply, just beneath the facade, we would discover that things are just as complicated as the other complicated models we’ve rejected. Nothing is simple; even black and white, the most natural colours are not so natural if we look deeply. If we look closely, we would discover that the natural colour we call black is made up of a host of other colours, blended together in complex unity. We know this but we are afraid of the complexness of the complexities. We just want to get things over with even when we know there’s more.

Nostalgia - My most embarrassing moment...

If you make enquiries from a lot of people as to their most embarrassing moment, they would likely share somewhat similar stories. For most guys, their most embarrassing moment would likely be when a girl turned them down in public. I strongly believe (even without research),that this is applicable to 60% of Nigerian guys.  Although I do not think it should be embarrassing, a lot of guys seem to feel it is. For me, getting turned down by a girl is perfectly normal even if it was in a stadium and attracted a lot of attention. I, however, cannot actually say how painful or embarrassing it is cos no lady has been bold enough to turn me down, even in private.  However, before you applaud my record, it would be good for you to know that since I was born, I have never wooed any lady, It has always been the other way round, hence the record. It is even getting to the stage that fellow guys are now coming after me. If you think I’m lying, read about my encounter with a gay here.